You hear it everywhere this time of year: “What are you giving up for Lent?” The Christian season of Lent stretches from Ash Wednesday (a few days from now) all the way to Easter. Many Christians honor Lent by giving up some source of comfort or some bad habit (chocolate, alcohol, swearing, Facebook, etc.). It’s a Christian cultural mainstay that’s become commonplace in popular culture as well, and while giving something up for Lent can be a good thing, I’ve been thinking about an important follow-up question that we don’t ask nearly enough: “Why?”

It was Ash Wednesday in 2011, and the church I was serving decided to try something new. The congregation wrote down the things they were giving up on slips of paper, and we posted these Lenten vows at the front of the church to encourage everyone. Maybe it was solidarity. Maybe it was peer pressure. Regardless, everyone’s vows were posted. It was my job to collect and assemble those slips of paper on a display board, but as I read over them, I started to ask that big question: “Why?”

Sure, there were the standard disciplines: chocolate, cussing, etc.,
but some seemed less about self-denial
and more about self-improvement:
eat healthier, exercise more,
and the one where I ultimately called BS,
“Lose 10 pounds.”

I tried to put myself in this person’s shoes, but as hard as I tried, I was never able to justify this Lenten vow. I found myself getting judgmental. “This is supposed to be about self-denial and empathy, and you’re thinking about your waistline? This isn’t a New Year’s Resolution, you vain…um…” I couldn’t finish the thought because I was trying not to cuss that Lent. I seriously considered wadding up the piece of paper and throwing it away, but this person really wanted to see “Lose 10 pounds” in the church entryway every Sunday until Easter. The big question to me was “Why?” What was this person’s motivation? For that matter, why do we give things up at all, and why did this person’s weight loss goal not fit my criteria?

Lent exists as a reminder of just how good we have it, and it calls us to refocus our attention on the spiritual.

Fasting from something can be a powerful generator of empathy for those who do not or cannot have it. A friend of mine once gave up gluten to better understand what people with Celiac’s disease go through. Another gave up alcohol to get a small taste of how alcoholics must feel when they physically have to abstain. Another gave up public transit to better understand how Jesus and the disciples traveled (and how many people still travel today).

Furthermore, many of the most successful Lenten vows also involve taking on something new. Don’t just give up chocolate; say a little prayer of thanksgiving every time you successfully refuse it. Don’t just give up your weekly guilty pleasure TV show; replace it with spiritual reading like the Bible or a prayer book.

But always and especially, make sure to ask yourself “Why?”
Why do I feel led to give up this particular thing?
Do I have a selfish motive in doing so?
Does my motivation align with what I think God wants for me?
Will this vow make me think of Jesus more often?
Should I even tell people I’m giving this up or just let it be between me and God?

Lent is an opportunity for introspection, new awareness, and renewed relationship with The Holy. Don’t let this season turn into Christian New Year’s Resolutions. If you choose to give something up, put serious thought into it.
And if not, can I have your chocolate?