The presence of God is a tremendous comfort, but people still need people. Even for the most diehard introverts, supportive community (family, church, bar staff, whoever) is essential to holistic care. At some point in almost every conversation with a patient or a bar patron or anyone else I may be concerned about, I will ask a few questions about support systems:
“Do any of your friends and family know you’re at the hospital?”
“Who’s been stopping by to visit you?”
“Who else could you talk to about this?”
“Who do you normally talk to when you’re feeling this way?”

In general, I always ask some variation of “Who can you lean on right now?” and if the only response is “God,” then we do some brainstorming to come up with a longer list.

While chaplains and ministers and counselors can do a lot to help a person reflect on life, we don’t take the place of a full supportive community. One of the best things you can do for a person in pain (whether physical, emotional, or spiritual) is help them identify others around them who they can lean on.

Humans aren’t meant to travel alone.

This post is part of a longer series on the principles undergirding bar chaplaincy. To start from the beginning, click here.